…In Endless Song

At age 13, I got my first job. Real job, real money, paycheck, etc. I know, you’re probably thinking that you can’t get a real job until you’re 16, which is generally true. But there was a special program for "at-risk" youth where we could work starting at age 13. There were all kinds of jobs to choose from, including office work, and retail, I don’t know what else, but I worked as a "custodial aide," helping to clean elementary schools for the Edmonds School District during the summer. I chose this particular job because I felt too dumb and incompetent to try anything else. Minimum wage was $2.30/hr, and I worked very hard for the money. We cleaned all the desks, all the floors, all the toilets, everything. Scrubbed, cleaned, scraped. We used scrapers which were basically razor blades attached to handles, to scrape all the gum and glue and other disgusting stuff off the bottoms of all the desks. 30 or so desks per room, 30 rooms in a school. We were busy.

One day, amid all the scraping and scrubbing, I managed to cut my hand with a razor blade tool. It was pretty bad, and there was blood going everywhere. I was so scared! Yes, it hurt, but that didn’t bother me quite as much as the fear I felt inside: I was scared that I was going to get into trouble for being clumsy. Scared of getting yelled at, of being fired over it. Scared to the point of desperately trying to hide it. Hide the injured hand, clean up the blood, try to ignore it all and just act like nothing was wrong.

When the boss found out, I was bracing for the worst!! So I was completely taken aback when he very gently and tenderly took my hand, cleaned it up, bandaged it and took good care of me. And all the while, he was talking in very soothing tones and making me feel better, sort of like how you might attend to an injured wild animal that doesn’t understand that you’re trying to help him. I was definitely the confused wild animal, scared out of my mind and shocked that someone could be this kind. This was a tender little moment in my life and I will never forget it. He may have thought he was just doing what needed to be done, but for me, I was absolutely surprised that someone would act with such care and compassion toward me, especially when I felt that I had done something bad and deserved punishment instead of compassion. It was a beautiful moment.

The Who - Behind Blue Eyes on YouTube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5JkHBC5lDs

Did you ever think that the strength of a bond between people is determined by the circumstances through which they meet, and/or the common thread of shared experiences? And how they handled it together? Like Brothers in Arms. Now there’s great song by Dire Straits about soldiers fighting together in a war. When you’ve endured major battles, stood hopelessly beside your friend in the trenches and yet lived to tell the tale, urged on and pressed forward by their support, and steadfast presence, then you just know implicitly that they’re awesome and they always will be. The war was crappy and you swear on your life that you’ll get as far away from it as you can, as fast as you can, but the the bond you have with your fellow soldier is solid gold, tempered by fire and it remains forever.

Through these fields of destruction, baptisms of fire
I’ve watched all your suffering, as the battles raged higher
And though they did hurt me so bad
In the fear and alarm, you did not desert me
My brothers in arms